


An Understanding Ear

by Rebeluprising



Category: Star Wars: Rebels
Genre: Arranged Marriage, Child Abandonment, Child disfigurement, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-29
Updated: 2018-10-07
Packaged: 2019-04-29 22:23:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 18,262
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14482461
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rebeluprising/pseuds/Rebeluprising
Summary: This is a story about Kallus' journey from the pre-Jedi purge to after the Battle of Atollon. It shows how Kallus' honor and moral compass changed based on his interactions with others and what he sees happening around him.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first story being posted for public viewing. I hope it is well received. I welcome any suggestions for improvement.

The _Ghost_ landed on Yavin 4 and everyone breathed a sigh of relief.  The mission was a success. Kallus’ intel led to the liberation of much needed supplies and rations. Zeb bragged how great Kallus has been for the rebellion. It was nice hearing the old soldier back in high spirits and proud of his recruitment (even though it was one of a passive kind).

 

Kanan, though, could not quite relax. All the crew, save one, was in high spirits. His padawan was pushing confusion into the force. A feeling that did not make any sense after the great mission they just had. “Hera, have you seen Ezra?”

 

Hera looked up from the controls for a second, “He’s in the cargo bay. He just lowered the ramp and is helping Zeb and the rest to unload all the supplies and rations.”

 

Kanan made his way down the hallway, stopping for just a second outside Sabine’s old room. He missed his surrogate daughter and hoped she was making strides with her people.  Ezra was indeed in the cargo bay, but was sitting on the ramp. The unloading of supplies went much faster than expected due to the other rebels pitching in as they were all excited to have new food and much needed supplies to stock up the armory and the med bay. The food was especially wanted due to many of them getting bored of the jungle delicacies.

 

“Hey kid, how are you doing?”

 

Ezra looked up and smiled, but his eyes were shadowed in the same gray feelings that Kanan had felt earlier. “I’m okay.”

 

“Kid, you say you’re okay, but everything I am feeling from you through our bond and the force around us says otherwise.”

 

Ezra flinched a bit at the slight reprimand, remembering the lesson Kanan and Hera had taught him about half truths and not dealing with one’s emotions. “Well, I have been a bit worried about Kallus lately. He feels off - not like he may rejoin the empire, but more like he is dealing with something he can’t seem to handle on his own.”

 

”Hmm, have you talked to him about it?  Maybe he needs someone to talk to and he is afraid to ask.”

 

“Yeah, but he has Zeb. They talk about almost everything and always seem to be catching up on all the local gossip and latest missions, “ Ezra said with his hands gesturing wildly in frustration.

 

“My guess would be Alexsandr is dealing with something that he feels he can’t discuss with Zeb. Why don’t you and I go find him. Maybe we can talk to him about it together.”

 

“Thanks, Kanan. I already asked Cassian and he said Kallus is sitting on the back steps of the temple. Apparently he likes to debrief operatives there instead of inside a cramped room.  Cassian thinks it has to do with his time with Thrawn and the escape pod.”

 

<><><><><>

 

Kanan and Ezra walked through the base, assisting rebels where they could as they found their way towards the rear of the temple. The inside of the building was big in its own right, but it became a maze after engineers got a hold of it and built new offices and rooms for storage, meeting areas and security zones.  Finally, a familiar corridor came into view and they were soon on the back steps looking into the vast jungle, filled with life and covered in a shroud of fog. Above them, the sky was graying into a pleasant dusk - giving everyone a much needed break from the imposing heat and burning taskmaster sun.

 

Kallus’ signature in the force was easy to find in the void of the temple’s exterior. Many of the rebels did not much care to be out on that side of the temple due to superstitions and stories of hearing voices and ancient battles being fought at night and throughout the creepy forest’s abode.  Kanan now could feel the emotions that Ezra had discussed with him earlier. Kallus was definitely dealing (or better yet - not dealing) with something that was causing him great distress. The amount of impact on him became more obvious when Kanan and Ezra were able to get within a few feet of him before he even registered that they were there. Kallus, as if being pulled out of a dream, suddenly looked up startled and at high alert - on guard against some image in his mind.

 

“Kanan, Ezra! Sorry I didn’t see you come up. Did something happen on the mission?  Did you need me to assist with some new plan or operation?”

 

Ezra stepped forward and sat down while Kanan took a step back and relaxed against the slowly cooling step. “No Kallas, the mission went fine. Kanan and I were just coming by to check on you. You have been feeling a bit off lately and we wanted to see if we could help you.”

 

Kallus’ eyes got wide for a second as he thought about what Ezra just said. “I am sorry. I didn’t realize that I was affecting you that much. I shall endeavor to try to deal with things further away from the temple. I don’t want to cause either of you any discomfort.”

 

“No, Alexsandr,” Kanan said as his hands came up in a comforting gesture as he pushed feelings of security and peace towards the skittish ex-agent.  “We are here to help you if we can, not to complain. All of us have things in our past that can be hard to remember and even harder to deal with on our own.  We want to offer our assistance, if we can, with whatever it is that is causing you such agony.”

 

Kallus slumped down, a very non-Coruscanti stature, and almost gave out a whimper. His eyes glistened for just a second before they went back to the trademark guarded eyes of a seasoned agent and spy. “I have been trying to get used to working with the rebellion. It’s been hard to let one’s guard down around the people who have every right to demand your execution and in some cases, to be the one to hand out the judgement.”

 

“Alexsandr, we know your past in the Empire and we believe in second chances, especially in our family. After all, if Zeb can forgive you then no one else has any reason to hold onto a grudge against you.” Kallus looked up to Kanan and worked what he said through his mind a few times. “Thank you Kanan.  I would like to talk about it, but it might hit a bit close to home - especially for you.”

 

Kanan looked at him with a curious confusion and then exchanged a quick glance towards Ezra before looking back to Kallus with determination. “Whatever it is, we will deal with it together. We are here to help as we said earlier. Remember Alexsandr, that when we took you into our ship and defended your life to the rebellion, you became a member of our family. We never leave one of our family hanging out to dry - especially when we can alleviate the pain and suffering they are experiencing.”

 

Ezra looked at Kallus, “Why would this be so hard on Kanan? You two had no dealings prior to Lothal and as far as I know, you have no intertwining histories.”

 

Kallus took a deep breath and closed his eyes. He spoke as if his words would hurt and betray him. “The events that I am wrestling with are tied to an anniversary that I cannot ever forget and one that, at times, makes me feel guilty about my present and my past. Today is the anniversary of my brother’s death and the day I grew to despise the Jedi for so long. A day that led me to becoming the Empire’s main rebellion and Jedi hunter outside of the Inquisitorius and later on to become an honorless warrior among honorable worlds.”


	2. An Understanding Ear

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kallus describes how his mother's choices early on affects the foundation of his own life.

“Wait. You’re saying today is the day that you chose to hate the Jedi. What could have possibly happened that would cause this?  The Jedi are honorable people - there is no way that anything they did could make you hate them. They -”

 

“Ezra, let Alexsandr talk. You only know the stories that I have told you. There is a lot of things about the Jedi that have happened that neither you or I know. I have heard of several good Jedi who have had brushes with the dark side and some who have done bad things for what they believed to be the right reason. Even some have gone all the way to the dark side and betrayed all that they have ever known. One such story, my master told me, was about a Jedi who went so dark that he pitted his own clones against each other and laughed while they slaughtered their own brothers on a cloaked battlefield.”

 

Ezra looked between Kallus and Kanan. Kallus hung his head in shame and felt like he was starting to think of escape routes, yelling at himself for even broaching the subject with the Jedi. Kanan turned his head towards Ezra and waited. Even behind the mask, Ezra could feel the stern look - an order to make things right. “Kallus, I’m sorry. We came here to listen and all I have done so far is hear a couple of sentences and jump to the defense of those I don’t even know. I’m ready to listen now. Please. Tell us what happened and how it caused you to have such a negative view of the Jedi for so long.”

 

Kallus closed his eyes and slowly willed himself to start to tell his story. “My family has a long history in the Coruscanti Elite. We have people who have seen the light and sky on the planet for dozens of generations. This legacy of elitism was never challenged - until my mother. My grandparents were happy to have a child, but saddened when all they had was a girl. Women on Coruscant, among the elite families, were many times considered trophies and baubles for men to show off to their friends. The lovelier and wealthier, the better. Now there were some women who ran businesses and served in governmental offices, but my grandparents saw them as examples of bad parentage and short-sighted upbringing. Unfortunately, due to their held beliefs, my mother was more an impediment to their success than a blessing. So, when she was very young, she was betrothed to a very wealthy family’s son. The agreement was that my grandparents would keep their wealth and titles and a stipend would be paid to the betrothed family from the age of majority until they died. At my grandparents’ deaths - all the money and estate would go into the husband’s account as long as they stayed married.”

 

“Wait, your grandparents sold your mother? That isn’t right. How old was she at the time?”

 

“Ezra, it was common practice among the elite to do so when one was hamstrung with a girl instead of a boy to rule one’s small piece of the galaxy. One just did as one was told. Now her age was somewhere around 4-6 years old at the deal, but she wasn’t told about it until she neared her age of majority and started to get interested in pursuing suitors.”

 

“But…” Ezra stopped upon feeling Kanan touch his shoulder to silence his continuous interruptions.

 

“So mother found out she was to be wed. She even knew the boy from their combined etiquette class. It was an agreed upon deal of both families in order to allow the children to get to know each other in the right environment. She found him to be a pompous nerf herder, who was always putting down other people and behaving as if he was somehow everyone’s superior. Even she found him to lord over her with his title and constantly telling her what she would do for him when he became her better half. Mother, upon hearing their plans, did the only thing she could think of and rebelled.  She ran away from home and boarded the first freighter that would take someone, no questions asked, to the outer rim with money paid upon safe delivery.

 

“She traveled among spacers, jumping from world to world. She changed her name, accent and learned how to read people and changes in the environment around her. She could get a sense by the way people treated her, that it was time to leave a planet and change everything about her again.”

 

“So, basically, she learned everything that you are able to do now, “ Ezra said as his eyes grew in understanding.

 

“Yes, she passed on a lot of her genes and lessons to me over the years - the ability to deduce and reason out persons and morph into whatever person I needed to become. In her travels, she met a smuggler and fell in love with him almost from day one. They paired up and soon she became pregnant. I was born many months later and a few years after me, my brother Niklas was born. Mother took care of the books and raising us and father did all the traveling.

 

“Unbeknownst to mother, father made some bad deals and paid for them with money he borrowed from various criminal enterprises. Always securing more money from an enterprise much bigger than the last until he owed a large sum of money to an affiliate of Black Sun.  To pay off his debts, they sold everything and ended up still owing money. They managed to make it back to Coruscant and settled in the seediest areas of the lower levels. With no money to move and no way to change identities any longer, we were found quickly by the bounty hunters that my grandparents had paid. A holo was sent to my grandmother and soon the story of my mother’s betrayal to the family was found out. 

 

“My grandparents quickly and publicly disowned my mother and informed her betrothed and his family of the humiliation and they made her name a curse among elite society. His family kept all the money they received and made my grandparents pay a fee for breaking the contract.  My grandparents then ordered their bounty hunter to pay my father a sum of money to let them have me since I looked like my grandfather. My brother looked more like our father so he was left behind.”

 

“Wait, how old were you when you were sold and what did your mother do?’ Kanan asked.

 

“I was around 5 years old. My mother took Niklas and left my father soon afterwards, afraid he would one day sell him as well. She tried to go to the law agencies about the sale, but the Coruscanti law agents were as corrupt as the elite that lined their pockets. They served the elite, not the lower level riff-raff and promptly kicked her out and told her to not come back or she would go to jail for child abandonment.”

 

“What about the Jedi. Surely they would have helped. All she needed to do would be to go to the temple and talk to a master,” Ezra wondered aloud.

 

“No,” Kanan answered, “the Jedi were busy with the war effort and left all Coruscanti business to the locals. They only became involved when the Chancellor or Senate requested their help outside of what they saw personally. Most of the Jedi, during that time, were busy training, learning and working with the clones and the Senate on how to end the war.”

 

“My grandparents raised me and kept some photos around of my mother - only because I was in them and when they tried to remove them, I became a right ruffian. They told me lies about my mother and raised me to be their only heir. I didn't even know she was still on planet until I was twelve years old. It was then that I saw my mother and Niklas on a field trip to the lower levels. It was designed to show us why we stayed up in the upper levels and reinforced a perception of superiority over the weaker and less privileged of Coruscant. That meeting started me on my stated path.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope to post some more chapters in the next couple of weeks. I am going to have to do some major editing (realized after a few preview suggestions). Thanks to all who gave me some suggestions.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kallus delves into the past pre-empire and begins to share a story that is sure to open old wounds.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took so long to update this story. Hopefully the next chapter will be able to be done in a more timely fashion.

Kallus closed his eyes as if he was shutting out everything around him and playing a recording of his past inside the big screen of his inner eyelids.  A short, hard breath heralded his inner thoughts towards the two Jedi sitting around him, “I guess I should start at the beginning and work my way forward.  After the bounty hunters took me, my grandparents felt I needed to be indoctrinated properly into their affluent circle. I spent 5 years being trained by private tutors and  guarded from anyone my mother may have convinced to come rescue me.

 

“Never being allowed to leave their sight without a chaperone and guarded constantly became annoying so for the most part I stayed home.  My grandfather told me how my mother and brother were sent to Kessel for breaking some law and kept reminding me how they saved me...I didn’t realize until later on that they were slowly brainwashing me into accepting their reality.

 

“At the age of 10, my grandparents had successfully made me into a proper looking and sounding heir and finally felt comfortable introducing me to others outside their exclusive society. I was sent to boarding school at that point. For the first couple of years, I behaved as expected - always obedient, always punctual and always rating top of my classes. Then, I met Corland. Corland was a mischievous miscreant with very wealthy parents who coddled him way too much. He was a skinny boy with no muscle strength and a head full of dull brown hair. But his eyes sparkled whenever he thought of a new plan or prank. He constantly harassed me during our free time until I finally gave in and soon we were best friends. Corland, as bad as he was, could do creative things with technology. He had this com that could change video files and hard disks with just a push of a button.” Kallus chuckled lightly at that memory. “I guess that’s really where everything changed for me.”

 

<><><><><><>

 

**Flashback - Boarding School**

 

“Kallus, wait up! Why are you always going so fast”, Corland asked irritably.  His breaths were coming quickly after exerting himself to catch up to Kallus’ long and quick strides.

 

“We have to keep up with the professor droid remember. You already got me in trouble last field trip with that prank on him. My grandparents almost had me come home after the school called about  _ us _ making the droid see everyone as wookies. You know how much I enjoy having this freedom and I refuse to lose it.”  Kallus stated while slowing his stride a little for his friend to catch up.

 

“You can say what you want, but you laughed just as much as everyone else did when the professor begged us not to tear him apart.”  Corland couldn’t keep the laughter from his eyes as he covered his mouth with his hand. Kallus couldn’t help but to allow a little smirk at the memory also.

 

“Masters Corland and Alexsandr, kindly join the rest of the class.”  The professor droid’s voice was an extremely nasal version of an upper Coruscanti accent and ground out any thought of rebuttal.  “As I was saying, this trip is meant to show you how happy you should be to live in proper society and not in these lower levels. Now follow closely as many of these reprobates have no qualms about selling good-standing citizens in order to better their lives,”

 

Kallus paused upon hearing that last line. Memories of the stories about his father selling him for a few credits in order to have some local cantina drinks still hurt.  His mother, they said, just stood by and nodded in approval.

 

“Kallus,Kallus!” His eyes widened as Corland grabbed his attention with a hit on the arm and dragged him back to the group. “We have to at least pretend to be learning, remember?”  Kallus nodded, paying attention once more to the ongoing drones of the professor.

 

“-don’t forget young masters that our society is based on people of each class doing as they should, not behaving properly is a way to guarantee removal from your privileged state and entry into the lower dark, desperate levels.  Only the dejected and hopeless souls live down there, forever placed with the dark-loving criminals and their organizations. For one of such a noble birth, the forced entry into the level comes with its own title - pariah. A pariah is one who has been stripped of title and birthright and is forever looked down upon. Never are you to ever speak to one or else you may find yourselves being called one as well. The pariahs of these lower levels may as well be the walking dead, never seeing the light of the day and always begging at the tables of their criminal overlords. Oh look, there is one such being now. Look closely young masters at the being below us. She is one who could have had it all and yet chose to snub her family’s wishes. Her carriage is of one endowed with great grace but stripped of her proper status and her young pup that she takes with her will suffer her same fate. The foolishness of youth, come now we must continue on our journey.”

 

Kallus lazily looked down to see the being the annoying droid motioned towards. Corland was beside him whispering how she didn’t look all that bad. The woman looked up towards their level, the strain of the label being heard even to her ears as if it was a direct hit from a sniper’s rifle. Her eyes suddenly widened as she and Kallus focused on each other.  Kallus blinked several times in disbelief. His eyes boring into the woman’s own, as if trying to ascertain how someone whom he thought dead on another planet could be staring back at him through ghostly orbs as if from a walking spirit.

 

“Corland, I need you to scramble the droid for me.”

 

“What? No! I was just kidding about that old woman. You’re going to get us both in a lot of trouble.”

 

Kallus huffed as he leaned forward towards Corland, “I will do your astromapping homework and your project if you do this.  I only need about 30 minutes.”

 

Corland considered the request, tapping one hand into the grip of the other. “Fine, but this time I want an A on the project.”  Corland squinted his eyes at Kallus with his version of a fierce, negotiating stature.

 

Kallus laughed a bit, “an  _ A _ is a sure sign that someone did it for you.  You are lucky if you can make a C in labs. You know the only reason you are passing astronavigation is because your father is paying for the headmaster’s new fancy yacht.”

 

Corland held his glare for a few more seconds before dropping his head a little, “Fine. But I won’t settle for less than a C minus.”

 

Kallus shook his hand, “Deal.  Now work your magic. Remember I need 30 minutes.”

 

Corland nodded his head and waited for the persnickety droid to continue the tour around the next corner before pushing his com’s button. “You’re good to go.”

 

Kallus snuck towards the closest lift and started his trek to the woman who looked very much like the photos he kept. _This woman is going to regret ever giving me up._ _I will make sure she knows exactly why she should stay down in this dilapidated, good for nothing metallic version of a sarlacc pit._

 

Kallus rounded a final turn and came face to face with his mother and brother. The woman had weary eyes and frazzled hair. She looked like years were pulled from her by some soul sucking creature.  Her face had worry lines on them that were a mixture of hope and fear. His brother had the looks that mirrored the typical impatience of youth, not understanding the sudden pause in their journey.

 

“Lexi is that really you?”  Kallus shrunk back . This did not seem to be the reaction of someone who sold their child for a few drinks and was now having to deal with the fallout. Rather this seemed to be the hopeful desires of a woman who had suffered loss and given up all hope of ever regaining a part of her life again.

 

Kallus eyed her skeptically, “You may be my mother, but I know the truth.  You allowed my father to sell me for some fermented offering at a bar. I want you to know that I will make you pay for your betrayal.”  Kallus’ eyes hardened at the woman. She shrank back for just a moment, tears forming and glistening like a fine covering of the sidewalk after a short burst of rain. Finally after the tears could not hold on any longer to the pulsing eye lids, they fell down her sunken in cheeks that appeared misplaced on a face that used to have more of a fullness to them from her previous life.

 

“Lexi, I didn’t know.  Your father sold you, yes.  But I wasn’t there. I tried to get you back, I begged everyone to intervene for me even if all they did was give me some credits so I could hire someone to help me.  No one would let me near you and no one wanted to intervene. Don’t you remember all the time we spent together when you were younger? Remember, we used to pretend to be other people - learning new accents and dressing up.  Lexi, please. Believe me. I never would have willingly given you up.”

 

Kallus struggled with this information.  Unsure of whether to believe her or not. Realization soon dawned as the limit of time was fast approaching.  “I have to go.”

 

“Lexi, please tell me you believe me.” His mother made a desperate grab of his upper arm. Her tears now coming down in a stream. “Please. Give me a chance and hear me out. That is all I am asking for.”  Kallus shrugged off her hand and his eyes softened at the hurt in her eyes as she realized that she may be seeing her elder son for the last time. She breathed in a short, stuttered breath before looking up, “We are living at the lowest level next to the Shisteven cantina. If you want to know the truth, come see me and your brother.  Just one visit is all I am asking for. After we talk, you can do whatever you want to do.” The woman turned and took the confused child with her.

 

Kallus watched them leave and remembered the agreed upon parameters for the excursion. He left quickly to catch up to the field trip again.  He would get to the bottom of this, one way or another. Someone will answer for what he went through, he just was no longer sure who that someone would be.

 

<><><><><><>

 

Kallus opened Corland’s dorm door with ease - putting all the breaking in skills he had learned from Corland to good use. “You know, you could be interrupting a very steamy moment right now if I had my lady here with me,”  Corland said without looking up from the new project he was working on.

 

“It would work out fine. Droids come with options to delete memories. In fact, the droid would probably be thanking me for saving it from having that memory forever tarnishing its hard drive. I actually think that your droid secretly wishes it was able to reach behind itself so it could do the deletions already.”

 

Corland grumbled a moment, “What do you want Alex?  Oh and why did I get a B on my project? I thought I couldn’t get more than a C.”

 

Kallus nodded his head while he picked up one of the small model fighters, “Well, I am calling in that particular favor now. I need you to hack into the professor and school’s systems.  Last night, I saw the posting about my grandparents sponsoring some new program here and it seems strangely coincidental to the pariah sighting on the field trip.”

 

Corland looked up, “First, it is not a favor since I didn’t agree to the added on circumstances to the project. Secondly, why do you care about some pariah sighting? The woman is just one more person down in the crappy lower levels. And finally, why would your grandparents reward the school for pointing out some old, unimportant creature anyway?”

 

Kallus sighed, “Because. Because the  _ pariah _ is my mother and the boy with her is my brother, Niklas.”  Kallus head dropped down, his hand rubbing at his temples. He knew Corland was his friend, but didn’t know what he would do with this information.  Most of the other students would use it against Kallus and as a way to get ahead. Some would use it to cull favors from him in order to keep it a secret. 

 

“Alex, I’m sorry.  I remember all the stories I heard when I was growing up.  Everyone was gossipping about it. I guess I just never put the stories and you together.  What are you looking for in the records?” Corland started hooking up his encryption key and slicer gear to the data terminal while looking for the latest password information (he had a source inside the main administration office).

 

“Knowing my grandparents and these recent events, I believe that they have set up some sort of reward system for the school that is activated whenever my mother or anyone else in her position are pointed out as pariahs.  Perhaps there is some sort of special programming in the professor droid that keeps his optic scanner constantly looking for possible matches. I’m really not sure what to look for, I just have this feeling that everything is connected.”

 

Corland made a noise of understanding and started slicing through information. “Well, your grandparents gave a hefty amount to the school at your registration, almost twice the typical registration fee.  There have since been six donations of equal amounts on six different dates. They seem to be completely random from each other. But, looking at the droid’s movement histories during the same time periods reveals that it was out on field trips on all of the listed time frames.  In fact, all of the field trips were to the lower levels of Coruscant in the same general area as we were today.”

 

Kallus slammed his fist into the wall with a grunt.  He would be feeling that pain later on. His head dropped and his shoulders tightened as the frustration of his situation started to become clearer.  “Damn them. I knew something felt off about that whole story. I knew it! But I had to be the perfect boy, even when I knew inside they were feeding me lies.  I always knew they could be vindictive, but this? Their own daughter!” His hand hit the wall a second time. “I need to get down there and talk to her. They want to make me and everyone else see her as some ongoing lesson of what happens when one betrays one’s own family. But they made a mistake letting me see her. I don’t know how much of what they told me is true, but I  _ will _ find out.  I want - no I need to know the whole truth.  We have some downtime coming up this weekend.  If I tell my grandparents that I am going to your home, can you cover for me?”

 

“What are you going to do?  You are not going to talk to her are you?  You see what your grandparents set up to punish her, how much more punishment do you think you will receive if they find out you are getting ready to betray them as well?”

 

Kallus threw his hands over his head, “She is my mother!  I need to know the truth. If I don’t like what I hear or I think she is kriffing with me, then I will come to your house. No harm done.  If not, then I will see about staying with her and meeting up with you at school on the first day back.”

 

“Fine, but I have to stay out of trouble on this op.  I have goals to be in the officer’s corp and they will only tolerate so much.  I have already been told that I am on thin ice for my recommendation from the school headmaster.”  Corland stood his ground. His eyes showing his determination and other than the noise of the communicator humming on the hologram table, the room became as quiet as space.  Kallus knew there would be no compromise.

 

“What is your plan for this  _ op _ then?”

 

“You com your grandparents and tell them that you want to stay with me.  Tell them that we will be working on the officer’s corp application essay portions and research papers.  No matter what happens either way, I can work on the research side of things and you can put your finesse into it on the final night before we go back so even your grandparents will see the hard work we accomplished. I may even get a leg up on some of the other applicants.”

 

“What about your parents?  Surely they will wonder about your imaginary house guest that never came.”  Kallus spoke while playing with a puzzle box on the desk. He opened it shortly after starting the puzzle. Corland turned toward Kallus and his mouth dropped open.   “Do you know how long I have been working on that kriffing box?” Kallus smiled at Corland, “Focus on the op remember.”

 

Corland huffed, “You won’t be imaginary.  You actually will come home with me. I will introduce you to my parents.  They have a bragging group that they hang out with and will love having you in their home.  We then will tell them that we have important work to do that your grandfather was adamant be completed during our time there. That alone will keep them from interrupting us throughout the weekend.  We will have all of our meals delivered outside my door to be picked up when we have breaking points. I even will have an opportunity to utilize my new program designed to speak for you through the intercom if they have any questions.”

 

Kallus looked over at Corland, “And how are you going to record enough of my voice to use a substitution algorithm for this program of yours?”

 

“Oh, we have been recording this whole conversation on a scrambled loop algorithm.  No two words are stored in sequential order so even if someone is able to grab it and decrypt it, it will come across as complete gibberish.  All duplicating words are automatically deleted during the recording process.” Corland looked rather smug with his privateer grin. He would definitely make a good spy in the corps.

 

“Sounds like we have a plan.”

 

<><><><><><>

 

**Present Day**

 

“Both your families fell for this?” Ezra looked at him with a sense of awe.  “I can’t believe they didn’t see through that whole plan.” Okay, maybe a sense of incredulity.

 

“Remember that our families never really had lots to do with us or each other. They were both in the upper circles, but my grandparents hung out with a much loftier crowd.  They also rarely had anything to do with offspring, it was what nanny droids were designed to do. They only intervened when we were caught doing something untoward or to steer us in a different path that would benefit them more.”

 

Kanan rubbed his beard with his knuckles. “You and Corland sound an awful lot like you and Zeb - always ready for the next job and supporting each other.  I think, though, that you are stalling this a bit. None of us have all the time to sit through a lengthy story so why don’t we get to the main point.”

 

Kallus nodded his head, aware that the night creatures were making their way out of their homes, and like the day creatures - his story is on a timeline, a very short timeline.

 

“Everything went as we hoped it would.  His parents welcomed me into their home and took holos as proof that I was there, mostly to show to their inner circle that they rub elbows with a higher caliber of people.  Corland worked on our papers and I snuck out to meet up with my mother and brother. It wasn’t easy to find them as I had to first steal some clothes and try to blend in before requesting some of the nicer looking beings to point out where she was staying.

 

“I found her within the first hours of the evening, before the final meal of the day.  She told me the real story about everything. Nothing was held back from me. I guess you could call it my first interrogation.  I questioned everything and wanted proof of what she was telling me. Everything was considered suspect until I had multiple follow-up questions answered.  Afterwards, the holos, journals, reports and verbal recounting of events was too much for me to refute. I believed her. It was decided then and there that we wanted as much of a relationship with each other as possible.  Niklas was also excited to have his brother back in his life, even though he had very few memories of me prior to my being taken away.

 

“Every couple of weeks, she would meet me near the school in various locations and in a multitude of disguises.  She taught me how to better my infiltration techniques so I could move about more easily in the various levels of Coruscant.  It also helped me to plan my escapes with much more ease. I was even taught how to beat interrogations in case I was ever caught.  It was routine for the school to use soft-technique interrogation droids when a student is suspected of wrongdoing. It was an ingenious plan.  She had learned the technique from a smuggling ring in the outer rim, just across the border with wild space. It is a method that she called hidden palace.  The technique has the person create rooms where information is stored, but the rooms move instead of staying in one place like a typical building. Entry into the rooms can only happen once the specified password is used, which could be a phrase, image or a combination of both.  This technique has worked well in hiding my fulcrum identity from Thrawn’s droids and even some low-level inquisitors.”

 

Ezra looked up in shock, “You were interrogated by inquisitors? Why?”

 

“All ISB agents had to go under routine evaluations for subterfuge and desertion.  High level ISB agents were put through extra tests. Obviously this system would not work with someone like the Grand Inquisitor or Darth Vader, but for low level inquisitors who are only looking for something to take back to make them seem more important - it worked rather well. The trick is to give them something juicy while making them work for it and not acting like you are only granting them a small morsel.”

 

Kanan nodded his head, “I think this is something we can use.  Have you told any of the high council about it? We could use this for our people in higher level or sensitive positions who can’t use the force for protection.”

 

Kallus nodded.  “I will speak with Senator Mon Mothma about it as soon as I can.”

 

Ezra looked towards Kanan, Kallus recognizing this as one of their Jedi conversation moments that he used to hate dealing with when he was going after them.  Ezra then looked back to Kallus, “Okay. We now know your back story about your mom and you. Let’s get to the heart of the matter. Tell us about what happened to your brother.”

 

Kallus nodded his head.  This would be one of the hardest stories for him to tell - a story that he has purposely not allowed any room in his conscious mind because of the personal demons that torment him with it.  It was time to tell them how he failed his brother and because of his failures to react quickly, the Jedi’s punishment that was meted out became a death sentence to his family. He just had no idea how he was going to get through reliving it again.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kallus states how actions surrounding his family helped to push him over towards helping the Empire.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry this took so long to post. I kept changing my mind on plot and finally just had to pick one to go with. Hopefully all of the characters' actions and words make sense.
> 
> As always, all of the Star Wars, Star Wars Clone Wars and Star Wars Rebels characters belong to Disney and Lucasfilms. Kanan comics characters belong to Disney, Lucasfilms and Marvel. I only take ownership of my OCs.

****Chapter 4

 

Kanan felt a wave of guilt, trepidation and sadness coming off Kallus. The ex-imperial was a cornucopia of dark emotions, threatening to overpower the two force users. Both had to reinforce their shields to escape the deluge of panic coming from the man. The intensity of which caused them both to grab hold of the light side of the force and thrust it forward as an extra shield to protect their minds from the onslaught.

 

Kallus’ eyes started to glaze over as the panic attack that had been building for hours started to finally take hold. The warm bricks of the sun-heated temple could not stop the unending shivering of the man’s body as his lungs started to spasm, causing a need of oxygen that his diaphragm refused to grant him. The panic intensified to a point that even the noises coming from the jungle could no longer reach his ears as his heart beat increased to a crescendo.

 

Kanan reached over to Kallus with his fingers tapping the man’s forehead. “Breathe, Alexsandr.” Kallus nodded his head in recognition of the words that he felt in his mind, but his body refused and continued the quaking muscles endlessly. His brain’s intense desire for life could not make purchase in his system as breathing became more labored. Warning signals traveled down his nerves, telling his body to give in to the life-saving orders or risk killing the whole for the sake of the quaking parts. His mind’s desperate plea held onto the suggestion of breath in hopes that someone, somehow, would quiet his body. Finally, a gentle push by Kanan alleviated the panic-stricken body enough to listen to the mind at last. Kallus relaxed, exhausted. His back held upright by the sturdy hold of the temple’s exterior walls, soaked up the welcoming warmth and hungrily attempted to extinguish the cold fear that had consumed it earlier.

 

Ezra, shaken by the episode, looked wide-eyed at Kanan. He was unsure of how best to approach Kallus now that the panic had subsided. Unwilling to accidentally start it back up, He waited on his Master to make the next move. Gently, Ezra scooted next to Kallus, carefully supporting him upright while leaving him enough room to not get the feeling of being closed in with no means of escape.

 

Kanan, continuing the gentle nudges for calmness and reminders to breathe, focused lightly on Ezra to make sure his padawan had managed to keep above the tidal flow of the previous emotional speeder ride. Ezra nodded towards Kanan and continued to gently balance Kallus. There would be no more threats of Kallus falling down the side of the temple from the panic-induced exhaustion of his body.

 

“Kallus, maybe we need to call it a night. We can always continue this in the morning”, Kanan offered. Kallus looked up, he found a face of concern staring back at him that was alarmingly easy to read even through the mask. His thoughts started to wander as his mind finally took hold of the entire situation. A quick run of pros and cons were done, exercises drilled into him while serving in the ISB and working his way through the academy’s tests. Questions were quickly answered in his head and either shelved or followed through to its logical conclusion, now that his brain had complete control.

 

“Thank you, Kanan, but if it is alright with you both - I would like to finish this now. I do not know if I will be able to bring myself to start this again after that embarrassing display of cowardice.”

 

Kanan grimaced a moment at the comment. “Kallus, you can’t help how your body handles stress. You are still recovering emotionally and mentally from Thrawn even though all your physical wounds have been healed for a while now. There is nothing cowardly about your system calling for a time out.” Kallus grunted in quiet denial towards Kanan. His mind trying to figure out if this is some sort of an olive branch or a way to make him feel better even though he did not perform as good as he should. “I would like to suggest a compromise. Let me put you under for a short sleep that will help your body and mind heal from some of the recent emotional damage and when you awake, we will continue the discussion.

 

“I believe Hera will probably want to hear this next part as I get the feeling that her input will be needed. This will also alleviate some of the need to rehash everything again with the Rebellion interrogators as her statements will suffice for any questions they may have. Besides, she is the foundation of this family, and yes you are a part of this family now.” Kallus eyes opened wide at that comment prior to his body relaxing again. “She will be able to keep an objective view through it all. I will get her caught up while you rest and Ezra will make sure everyone else stays off the ship until you are comfortable with the others’ return.”

 

Kallus eyed them both warily for a moment. Ezra looked hopeful towards him and Kanan awaited patiently for his answer. His visage a tribute to the Jedi’s sense of peace and calm in a stressful situation.

 

Kallus closed his eyes for a moment weighing the full measure of the compromise in his head. “O..okay. I agree. But no one else except you both and General Syndulla. I do not want to belittle all that Garazeb has gone through and I especially do not want to worry about Chopper recording everything and playing it for Orrelios prior to me being able to tell him in my own way and on my own timing.

 

“Agreed”, Kanan and Ezra answered in unison. “You have our word as Jedi that nothing you say will go further other than what Hera deems the rebellion leadership needs to know. Chopper will not be there nor will Zeb.” Kanan stated to alleviate any questioning the prior agent can come up with to try to back out of the compromise.

 

All of them returned to the _Ghost_ using routes that kept them clear of prying eyes and inquisitive soldiers. Kallus started to feel better as they went up into the cargo hold of the freighter. A sense of comforting assurance that he can finally be secured from those who would judge him harshly for emotions out of his control. He already knows everything that they are now able to judge him on that was in his control previously as an agent; they do not need further fodder to use against him. It was a strange feeling that this ship that was designed to weather the coldness of space has become his place of warmth and security that he has not felt in several decades. Ezra soon left them to prepare Sabine’s old bunk for Kallus to sleep in. Kanan slowly escorted him to the colorful room, filled with the artistic style of a youth who longed for home and found it in an unlikely crew.

 

Kallus sat on the comfortable bunk and Kanan lowered the lights with a wave of his hand. “Alexsandr, I want you to lay back and clear your mind. Picture only the landscape of a location that you associate with peace. No one is there with you. Feel the warmth of the environment, not too hot but no coldness there either.” Kallus hummed a quick assent as his breathing evened out once again. “I am going to put you under now. Your mind will stay open to the beauty around you, there is no worry here. Only peace. _Sleep_.” The last word came across more as a breath in his mind than a spoken thought and Kallus found himself alone on the beautiful, floral landscape of Naboo.

 

Kanan quietly exited the now darkened room and went to the cockpit after locating Hera’s presence through the force link that they shared - one not of a force bonding two sensitives, but rather a bonding of two souls that over time have become one bright shining light in the force. A quick check back to the room through the force told him that Kallus was sleeping peacefully and that Ezra managed to corral Zeb and chopper off the _Ghost_. The door to the cockpit opened before he had the chance to gesture at the controls and Hera glanced back at him for a moment prior to continuing her checklist of repairs and assignments.

 

“Hello, love. I understand from Ezra that you were able to start to get a grasp on what was going on, but had a bit of a situation along the way.” Kanan nodded prior to sitting in his co-pilot’s chair.

 

“That is putting it mildly. The man had a full on panic attack. I never thought I would ever see him in such a weakened state. I was finally able to get him to relax prior to convincing him to allow me to put him under for a bit and give his body and mind a break from his overworked muscles.”

 

Hera’s eyes widened as her lekku twitched at the image of the ruthless agent being so vulnerable and damaged after previously hunting them so vigorously. “What is the plan? Are you going to continue the discussion with him or are we going to have to do this some other way? There are not many doctors in the rebellion right now, and psychiatrists are non-existent.”

 

“It’s been agreed that after his body and mind have a chance to recover, the three of us will listen to his story on the _Ghost_ where we have some medical supplies - just in case of a repeat episode. Besides, the force is telling me that you will be needed for this next part.”

 

Hera stared at him for a second before mentally planning out what she needed to do in order to make it happen. Her datapad moved slightly as she filed things away and sent a few short messages. “Okay, Kanan, I informed command that the _Ghost_ is out of rotation due to an internal matter. All of Kallus’ upcoming meetings and interviews have been rescheduled. He is off active duty until further notice. I also secured quarters for Zeb so he has somewhere to go in case this takes longer than a few hours. Chopper has been told to meet up with AP5 and assist with his duties until further notice. Now, what do you need me to do while Kallus rests?”

 

Kanan shifted for a moment and then proceeded to catch Hera up on what was said earlier. Ezra eventually came into the cockpit after a quick check on Kallus and sat in his usual rear seat, awaiting the end of the long story. The cockpit slowly seemed to get smaller as the tension from the story increased Hera’s understanding of some of the things that drove Kallus.

 

Afterwards, Hera shook her head in disbelief. “Well, at least now I understand why he seems so dysfunctional in his thought process towards morality at times. How can anyone deal with all of that without some tarnishing occurring?”

 

Kanan shook his head. “We aren’t even to the worst of it yet. He managed to tell us all of that without freaking out until the end. The next part, I believe, will be the worst of it or on the way to that end. Even though it hurts him emotionally, it is also necessary for him to acknowledge the past so he can heal and move forward.”  Kanan removed his mask and closed his eyes. His fingers rubbing the eyelids and scar as he gave up the stress and emotional baggage to the force. “He is starting to wake up. Hera, could you please lock up the ramp while Ezra prepares the common room? I will go help Kallus make the transition into waking as smoothly as possible.” Both nodded and began their assigned tasks. Kanan left to start the process of helping Kallus wake up, while stilling his mind from thoughts that would bring upheaval to his body once more.

 

Kallus saw Naboo slowly dim in his mind as he began to wake. A calm presence kept the old foreboding feelings at bay. He opened his eyes to find Kanan kneeling calmly beside him. “How are you feeling?”

 

Kallus nodded at the Jedi with a small but natural smile coming to his face. “I am feeling much better. I think that may have been the most refreshed I have felt in a very long time.” Kanan chuckled prior to rising up and turning the lights to their full brightness with a slight gesture.

 

“Good, I’m glad you are doing well. I have informed Hera of everything. She and Ezra are waiting in the common room for us to join them. Remember that this next bit will be up to you to tell, but we will not judge you in any way. We are here to help.” Kallus nodded and then rose smoothly to join the Jedi in exiting the comfortable room. They made their way to the common area, both preparing for the task ahead. Hera and Ezra were already sitting at the Dejarik table with four mugs filled with steeping tea, waiting along with some of the better ration bars and a plate of wonderful sweet-smelling fruit.

 

The cold, metallic room did not affect Kallus as the calm assurances from Kanan kept his feelings of fear at bay. Kallus breathed one large breath to still his nerves and sat down while releasing his breath and tension all at once. As he finally felt prepared to start his story, Kanan released the mental suggestion on him and prepared himself to finally hear the reasons for everything.

 

Kallus paused a bit while sipping his hot tea, caf would have been more to his liking but the tea did keep his nerves calmed. He glanced up and saw the three others patiently waiting on him to start. One more breath to steel his nerves and then he started to think of how best to begin.

 

“Towards the end of my schooling, before the empire took over and my path was chosen for me, Corland and I were busy preparing for our final exams. We were discussing classes and how best to pass exams that were meant to glean the studious persons from the ones who would become nothing more than wealthy shells. I brought up to him about Niklas sending word that there was a shortage of rations in the lower levels. We had already managed to sneak some food into our dorms from the galley while studying there and talking with the cooks. They did not care what we took and even sometimes gave us treats if we came back with good grades.

 

“One day, Niklas sent word that Mother wasn’t feeling well and that the rations had stopped all together. I was determined to check into it and would bring enough to keep them supplied for a while on my next trek down there. Prior to my making it out of the school, however, the whole campus was placed on lockdown. The headmaster claimed it was due to some students getting exam answers on the black market. I do not know if that was right or not, but exams take three weeks to complete, which would mean that Niklas and Mother would spend that time either without food or stealing to survive. Niklas’ main buyer for his works was no longer coming down to purchase the items due to recent Republic regulations targeting the black market and the syndicates. It was the second week in to the exams when everything went from bad to worse.”

 

<><><><><><>

 

**Boarding School Flashback**

 

Kallus and Corland were studying in the school’s common area - a flourished room filled with august draperies and refined works of art. The warm sitting areas with large wooden tables seemed to be of a size found on Kashyyyk rather than on the mostly human-populated Coruscant.

 

The two didn’t even notice the diminutive body of the headmaster’s secretary as she entered the room. She was as skinny as a pole, and lovely to look at - until she spoke. Her voice sounded like a droid with a digital box in serious need of oil, the squeaks coming from her throat was akin to scratching nails down a coarse board. “Master Kallus, the headmaster requires your presence immediately.” She waited for no answer prior to leaving as silently as she came. Kallus looked at Corland for a moment, rolling his eyes towards the ceiling.

 

Corland chuckled quietly, “What did you do this time? I never get summoned by way of Droid Squeaky. It’s always a formal letter explaining how my actions have embarrassed the school and my family would have to make restitution.”

 

Kallus snickered, “I don’t know, it must be important enough to relinquish control of that outer office” He started to pack up his datapads and left the room. The walk down the hall to the headmaster’s office was long and filled with the shields of every well-known family to ever walk these halls. The Kallus shield was a large one broken into three parts to denote their equilateral contribution in the banking, imports and military sectors. The Coruscanti images of a purple and tan Hawk-bat crested the shield while the ghostly appearance of a Corridor Ghoul hunkered down below. The symbolism of protection and predator reminded Kallus of the eat or be eaten philosophy of his family. The images of scales and towering credits adorned one-third of the shield and half the upper level while crossed elongated rifles atop a rangefinder scope adorned the other half of the top. The last part was almost likened to a backwater bazaar with renditions of sales going on while a freighter dropping off goods to a small image of an unidentifiable person handing over a sack of credits. The shield was a constant reminder of what was expected of Kallus throughout his schooling and his family’s generous donations made sure the shield was kept in a place of honor.

 

The long walk ended at two large doors of stylized wood. They looked warm and even felt so, but behind them laid the offices of a cold and calculating man who only thought of himself and how he could make more credits and bolster his withering reputation. After a quick knock and a squeak of “Enter”, he found himself in the offices of the headmaster. The students considered this to be a bit like one would see in the royal palace of Naboo, but they were wrong. Kallus had strong memories from his childhood of a palace that glowed in the sunlight but did not make the observer feel like a peasant within its walls.

 

There were floral decor on every small and large table, each one of a different decorative style. The hard onyx tiles that lined the flooring made every step sound like thunder in a canyon as Kallus marched across the room to the secondary set of doors that hid the headmaster’s inner sanctum. A quick knock and a long moment of waiting prior to Kallus being heralded inside seemed like torture as he wondered what this summons was about.

 

This room was a lot like Droid Squeaky’s, but filled with relics of multiple outer rim planets and some prized treasures of core worlds, the kind that would be frowned upon by the native inhabitants. In two large chairs sat officials of both the Republic Senate and the school.

 

“Young Kallus”, the headmaster - a short and rotund man with thinning hair and sallow cheeks, stated, “allow me to introduce you to Chancellor Palpatine.”

 

“Chancellor, it is an honor and privilege to meet you. How may I be of service?” Kallus asked.

 

An odd quirk came to the old man’s face, “my boy - there is much I believe you will do for me in the future. But first, I talked to your headmaster and he assures me that you are at the top of your classes in negotiations and intergalactic law.” Kallus nodded his head sharply.

 

“Yes Chancellor. Is there something that you would require from me? I would think that your staff is more than capable to handle anything that would happen.” His mind wondering how he would be needed when scores of brilliant negotiators already worked for the senate and were sent out religiously to help with ongoing problems. One of the best that came to mind was Padmé Amidala of Naboo. She was known by his mother via one of her handmaidens, who kept the family hidden away from bounty hunters for a time in the palace.

 

“You misunderstand, I do not require your assistance at all.” Kallus dropped his head sheepishly. “Rather, I am here to help you. The Jedi have kept the war going for much longer than what was necessary in order to help bolster their will on the people. They have stolen all the food from the lower levels and are sending it off world. I have spearheaded a group to beg for them to see reason and follow the ancient path of their order and recognize the needs of the poor innocents of the lower levels. Surely you know something about their needs?” Kallus raised his head and saw a twinkle in the grayed out eyes of the man that seemed to be an indication of some sort of dark influence, a feeling that caused the young man to shiver involuntarily. It was impossible for him to know about his mother and brother. Surely two people would not come across the desk of a man responsible for an entire galaxy.

 

“No, I do not know - I apologize Chancellor.” The grin on the Chancellor’s face widened, “My mistake then. Would you care to join me on my endeavor?”

 

Kallus looked at the headmaster for permission. “We will put this trip down as a substitution for your final two exams. The Chancellor has made it very clear that you will be a great representation for the school and the government and that the rewards would be substantial, for the school - of course.” Kallus fought hard to not roll his eyes at the man’s never-ending greed prior to nodding and looking back at the Chancellor, “I am all yours.”

 

<><><><><><>

 

**Present Day**

 

Hera’s lekku curled up in bewilderment as her eyes widened, “Did Palpatine really know about your family?” Her mind processing the story rapidly, placing tidbits into place for further questioning later.

 

“Yes. I did not find out until much later that the Emperor took a very tight control of my life and endeavors. He somehow saw what I would be doing and where I needed to be placed in order to make certain decisions. He always acted like I had some sort of odd preordained purpose to serve him and his cause.” Kallus grunted as he massaged his temples and leaned back into the curvature of the bench.

 

“Sidious had everyone fooled, not just you Alexsandr. Many Jedi masters and knights trusted him as the Chancellor. I only ever saw Master Windu look on him with suspicion, but even he fell silent when admonished by Grandmaster Yoda. There was always a strangeness when he came into the council chambers though. All the masters appeared to recognize inwardly a threat and raised their shields, but none saw the frail Palpatine as the purveyor of the darkness to come. Master Windu would leave the troubled council after Palpatine exited, sometimes he would include my master in his meditations.” Kanan closed his eyes tight while working through the painful memories.

 

Ezra looked up towards Kallus, “I don’t understand. What was so important about you accompanying Palpatine, or Sidious or whatever, to the Jedi temple?”

 

Kallus closed his eyes for a moment as he braced himself against the bench seat once more. “You have to understand that the Senate, under Palpatine’s guidance, put the Jedi in charge of a lot of the reparations for the affected worlds. While they were holding the Jedi up in one hand, Palpatine was starving the people of the lower levels of much needed food and medicine with the other. He made sure that holocasters took close up shots of well fed Jedi and large fruits along with much needed medication being put on Jedi warships for dispersal. One of the things they loved to take holos of were Jedi younglings eating a piece of fruit and then throwing out the rest without a care in the world.” Memories of street urchins licking lips while stomachs growled at the images came to mind as Kallus remembered the events.

 

Ezra shook his head a moment, trying to grasp everything that was being said. His memories on the street were of various food sellers and people doing similar things, but there was always farms to work and fish in ponds if you were able to outsmart the troopers to access them. Kanan looked at him a moment, “Remember that Coruscant is a city planet so there is no way for the population to produce food for themselves. All food and medication had to come from other worlds. There was no one else that they could go to for the supplies other than either the government or smugglers.”

 

Ezra nodded his head prior to looking back towards Kallus again, ”I guess I just don’t understand how all this affected your story. I understand they didn’t have food and your mother was sick, but how did all this become a turning point for you?”

 

Kallus closed his eyes again, “That occurred not long after getting to the temple.”

 

<><><><><><>

 

**Jedi Temple - In the Past**

 

The Chancellor’s large and sleek ride made quicktime from the boarding school to the Jedi temple. His driver had clearances that allowed him to bypass much of the busy traffic and close confines of the large buildings. As they prepared to land in the highly secured area that was designated for diplomats and officials visiting the Jedi temple, large crates were seen being checked off by diligent clone troopers in multiple colored armor. Each trooper appeared to either be wearing a white shiny armor or a dusty armor with various designs and colors painted on it. The crates that were being checked off were scanned and rated for quality prior to being taken by other troopers and droids to be loaded onto the large ships parked along the other side of the busy tarmac.

 

A figure dressed in dark robes was making his way across the area while keeping to the shadows formed by the crates and towering spires. The troopers did not seem to notice the interloper as they continued their work with haste. Kallus saw the figure just as they approached one of the medicinal crates. A movement of familiarity caused Kallus to think of his brother, Niklas, but that would be impossible. His brother was home with their Mother, caring for her until he could bring them some supplies to alleviate their needs.

 

The being approached one of the solitary crates and put his hands on it to lift the lid and look inside. Suddenly another figure ran towards the crate, the dark figure with metallic ornaments on her head jumped up and landed near the would-be thief. The exposed boy jumped back from the crate as the young Jedi pulled out her lightsaber and ignited it. He turned as if to flee, but then looked back longingly at the crate again. The Jedi’s initial expression of disbelief changed to annoyance as she watched the boy go back to the crate to steal the medication. In a fast movement, the Jedi jumped again and landed near the boy clutching a vial from the crate she was supposed to protect. The lightsaber made a swift movement and cleanly sliced the hands off the thief’s wrists as another young Jedi, appearing to be a blue Twi'lek ran towards the scene. As the boy’s hood finally fell off his head onto his shoulders as he screamed in pain and disbelief, Kallus finally came to the realization that the boy was indeed Niklas. He reached a hand out to him and screamed out his name. Palpatine turned towards the scene as the lightsaber was suddenly yanked by an invisible force out of the young Jedi’s hand by a strange, small creature.

 

The creature’s ears folded down upon his head as he walked calmly towards the group using a small cane to support him. A breath of sadness and frustration left him as he turned towards the two younglings. “Initiates Tai and Sammo, harsh judgements a Jedi does not give out first. Much more knowledge on dissuading crime you need, before out of this temple you will be allowed to go.” The two younglings dropped their heads before the green Jedi Master. “Go, into the temple you will. Think on these incidents, you must. Much you have brought on this temple that is unknown.”

 

The duo fled the scene into the grand building while the older Jedi approached Nicklas who was sitting on the ground. He held his arm stubs together and cried out in shock as a gnarled hand reached out and lifted his chin. “Theft this was, but for another, hmmm?”

 

Niklas nodded, “Yes my mother. She is dying. I had to take it. What..what will I do now?” The boy cried out as Kallus reached out to comfort him. Shame at knowing that he could have helped Niklas if he had identified him sooner and been stopped from making the disastrous choice of stealing.

 

The older Jedi nodded his head at the two young boys, “To medical, you will go. Heal you, they will. No prosthetics we have to give, as the war requires them elsewhere.” Kallus looked up in shock as another Jedi, Skywalker approached. He could not help but to notice the prosthetic hand attached to one of his arms as he and his brother were ushered into the temple by several clones.

 

Later on, Palpatine met them in the medical wing. The young boy had on medicinal bandages and devices that held bacta to help speed up the healing process. Kallus sat next to him, unsure of how to comfort his overwhelmed brother. Somehow the room failed to help Kallus deal with all that had happened as Jedi healers ran around taking care of wounded and looking at the two with a mixture of sympathy and apprehension. “The academy as well as your grandparents have been notified. Your grandfather is on their way now. I am so sorry my boy. I feel some of this situation may be my fault. If I hadn’t brought you here, the guards would have noticed the boy sooner and may have kept him from his errant decision.”

 

Kallus sniffed a moment and shook his head, “No, it’s not your fault Chancellor. The Jedi have slowly been ruining everything. They have been taking our food and medicines and now they take our limbs with no consequences. Even prostheses are too good for anyone but them and their clones. And now, my brother will no longer be able to pay off their debtors. I’m afraid of what will become of them.”

 

The Chancellor’s eyes had a moment of reddish hue before turning back to the normal gray shade, “Ah, my boy. I wish I could have done something for you and your brother. The Jedi mean well, but they carry a heavy load for all of us. We, who are able, must help carry this burden. I will make sure that both your brother and mother get taken cared for.”

 

<><><><><><>

 

**Present Day**

 

Kallus’ head was lowered as tears slowly crawled down his cheeks. “I was transferred from the boarding school to the military academy shortly after returning. It was on Chancellor Palpatine’s orders. I worked hard, thinking that if I did enough that someone would let me get the medical care for my brother and mother that they needed. But I failed. My brother couldn’t make the items to sell and pay the debt and soon a member of the local support gang to the Black Sun syndicate arrived. My brother was killed and his body destroyed by a refuse droid. My mother was later found dead inside her home. The medication that was promised to them never came. I found out about everything during my first semester at the academy. The Chancellor said he tried to help, but the Jedi would not relent.” A forlorn look towards Kanan and Ezra told of a worse part to come.

 

“It wasn’t soon after that the Jedi were labeled as traitors to Coruscant. The people resisted the charge at first, but video of my brother’s punishment and my reaching out towards him began to play all over the planet in earnest. The Jedi were blamed for it all. The story of how my mother died from lack of medication and how my brother was punished for attempting to take it helped seal the people’s growing hatred for the well-fed and healthy members within the hallowed temple. When Darth Vader entered it later and killed them all, people cheered. I even received holos from people congratulating me that my family members were finally avenged. I am ashamed to say that I gladly took those holos and kept them as my hatred for the order continued to grow.”

 

Kanan and Ezra looked at each other. Hera put her hands on both his shoulders to attempt to keep him grounded in the moment, “Kallus, you know their deaths were not on you, right?” Kallus looked up into Hera’s green eyes, fear of their thoughts of him showed as his eyes widened and the panic once again took hold.

 

“You do not understand. I stayed in the Empirical Academy and then moved on to the ISB. I continued my hatred by finishing the academy and then helping hunt down and kill all the Jedi and their sympathizers. Later on, I would finalize my conversion to a, to a monster. I would become the murderer, the killer of a planet destined to be grounds for enjoyment by wealthy cretins.” His breath became ragged as his thoughts overwhelmed him once more. The final memory of that moment being punctuated with a light touch to his forehead and a whisper in his mind, “Sleep”.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope to do better with my updating this next round, no promises.


	5. Onderon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kallus reveals the terrors of his time on Onderon. Trigger warnings for war crimes, death of non-major characters and torture (occurs after subtitle: Onderon).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry this is late being published. Life became a bit hectic, but I hope to be able to continue adding chapters within 1-2 months from here on out until I feel the story has ended.

Kallus’ head rested on the dejarik table, his eyes moving at a slow pace as the force’s command kept his mind stilled while his body became further regulated. Kanan spared a look from Kallus up to Hera. He managed to not jump back as her force presence clearly registered her glare at him. He can see in his mind’s eyes the green stare that always made him wince whenever she deemed something he did was not up to her standards or orders.

“Ezra, go check on the engines and calibrate the sensors”. Ezra was about to argue that it was unnecessary while being out of rotation, but the looks being shared between both of his guardians led him to scurry from the room, lest they decide to make him the focus of their ire. Kanan could sense Ezra’s force brush up against his with a feeling of good luck prior to fleeing to the other side of the ship.

“What is it Hera? I don’t understand why you’re acting like this.” Kanan raised an eyebrow at her along with one hand gesturing towards the door, closing it quickly to allow some semblance of privacy in the echoed ship.

“Kanan you know exactly what the problem is and don’t act like you don’t! You are keeping Alexsandr from dealing with everything that has happened in his past.” She got up to put the mugs in the strainer and clean up the already pristine galley. “He has to deal with it now while he has people to look after him. You are only putting off the inevitable breakdown, which you of all people should know will always happen at the worst possible time.”

Kanan crossed his arms and narrowed his eyes. He sensed Hera across the room continuing to work in the galley huffing a little to allow her to hear his frustrations. “I am only doing what I think is best. Besides, I did okay dealing with everything this way.” His smug smile further unnerved Hera as she put her fists on her hips and her lekku sharpened to points at her back. 

“Oh right. You absolutely did. How Master Depa must have loved seeing you from the afterlife getting drunk everyday, cavorting with anything that walked and was willing to take your money and getting into fights. Yep, she sure would have been proud with how you dealt with your pain.” Kanan grimaced slightly before frowning at the memories. “Oh and let’s not forget how well you took to finding all those clones on that old Republic AT-AT on Joopa Base at Seelos. Wow, yep sure did handle that memory well. If I recall from everyone’s reports, except yours, you were ready to kill them all until Ezra stepped in and reminded you that Ahsoka said they were friends. Wonder how much better that would have gone if you had dealt with everything before hand? Guess we’ll never know. But yes, absolutely, I am sure Alexsandr with no force ability to free himself from his anger and pain would be able to handle that kind of pressure and memories while out on a mission.”

Kanan rose and narrowed his eyes at Hera. The expansive room suddenly feeling a little bit cooler and smaller with the heaviness of righteous anger sparking static around them. “You know kriffing well about my past. How dare you bring it up like that to me now. I was hiding from the Empire, you know that. I was a teenager and Kallus is a grown man. He can deal with these things better than most.”

Hera leaned forward, ignoring the way her skin slightly tingled, “On Seelos, you were already getting reconnected to the force, was well on your way in training Ezra and had already dealt with a lot of the guilt. And yet, you could not handle the way the clones made you feel. If the Empire had attacked you then and there, you would have had to deal with a two front battle and you and Ezra may have survived, but Zeb and Sabine probably would have been severely hurt or killed because you would have been stuck back on Kaller.”

Kanan was taken aback for a moment, picturing likely scenarios in his head. The air slowly warming as realization hit of how much trouble his team, his family, would have been in if not for the force’s timing in everything. “I, I guess you do have a bit of a point, but Hera…” Both turned as an echo of crates being thrown aside in the cargo hold made it to the common room. Cursing and growling along with a few beeps also made it ahead of the duo before the door swooshed open and the lights from the hallway were blocked by the large Lasat and Chopper at the entryway.

Zeb stood there, his ears flat upon his head and his fur stuck out as if he recently became personable with an electronic circuit board. “How could you? You force me to leave the Ghost for what - so you can help Kallus deal with his past. Karabast! I am the one who got him starting to look at it. Didn’t it once occur to either of you that perhaps I should be here as well?”

“Look, big guy,” Kanan made a step forward to Zeb just prior to retreating as the low, warning growl made his self-preservation instincts kick in. Zeb stared him down baring his large canines as his scruff went to full spiked mode. His claws, coming out on pure instinct, made shallow digs into the common room’s floor as he stared the Jedi down. “Zeb, we are only doing what we felt was right. Kallus asked us to keep you and Chopper away and we swore we would. We didn’t want him to feel cornered and unable to talk about what was going on in his mind.”

Hera stood closer to Kanan as she eyed Zeb, remembering the last time she saw this type of anger from him was when they found those T-7 ion disruptors. Her memories of that moment quickly shifted as she saw Chopper slowly creep up to the mural on the wall. She caught Chopper snag an object from behind the bench seat and start to move towards the door. “C1-10P, stop right there. What did you just grab from behind the seat and how did you and Zeb know what was going on?”

Chopper turned his dome a few times, beeping several minutes and moving his manipulators as he spoke quickly to Hera. “What do you mean Zeb made you do it? When have you ever done anything that Zeb wanted you to do?” A small sound of “rustbucket” was heard as Kanan slowly moved to stand next to Hera allowing the focus to move from the foreboding Lasat to the cantankerous droid. 

Chopper beeped a few more times before he scurried out of the room. Hera turned towards Zeb. “Okay, what is your story?”

Zeb muttered another curse under his breath as he rubbed the back of his neck a few times. His ears switched from flat to twitching as he felt the interrogating stare from Hera and Kanan. “Look, I saw Kallus boarding before Ezra got me and I knew that he must have started to share some of his story with you so I told Chopper to put a device in here so I could know what was going on. Neither of you were telling me and I was worried. A soldier knows when a fellow soldier is circling the abyss and Kallus wasn’t just circling anymore, he was ready to fall straight in.”

Hera shared a look with Kanan before huffing out a breath and nodding. “Fine, you can stay but it will be brought up to Kallus and he will decide whether he wants to share the rest of his story with you or not. Oh and whatever you promised Chopper in agreement for his cooperation will stand as well. Don’t ask for us to intervene on your behalf. And as for you spying on us, you have kitchen duty for the rest of the time that the Ghost is out of rotation for whoever decides to cook, whether a lot of utensils and pans are used or not.”

Zeb looked down for a moment, his ears going down to the sides a bit. “That seems fair.” His ears twitched as Kallus took a deep breath for a moment and then quietly went back to a deeper sleep. “Hera, what Kallus is working himself up to is his time on Onderon and Lassan. He thinks that somehow his involving me in his pain will cheapen my grief, but he is wrong. I know what battle and killing sometimes does when it goes against your own moral compass. He needs people who understand that and are willing to look past it in order to help him come to his own understanding and be able if not ready to forgive himself.”

Hera and Kanan looked at each other. Both have many memories of decisions made that created moral dilemmas later on after the dust settled. Hera remembered some of the decisions her father made and how aggressive he was with the enemy. But, she also remembered having to make decisions of her own that led to deaths of informants and persons who did not share her viewpoints of the empire. 

Kanan also had memories that at times kept him awake at night. Memories of his master and the clones that were once his friends. How many of them were killed in an attempt to get away. There was a time that it did not bother him as much, but after meeting Rex and realizing that the clones were surgically made to carry out commands as flesh born droids with only a surface-deep individuality to them made him regret some of his decisions. The clones that realized their chips were bad and had them removed, also had to deal with the loss of their brothers after the Jedi chose to not intervene right away - sentencing their own order and their companions in battles to their deaths.

“You’re right.” Kanan nodded. “Kallus should be waking up soon and then we will deal with this as a complete crew, as a family.”

Zeb turned towards Kanan. “No more putting him to sleep. He can’t deal with everything if every time he starts to panic you give him a way out. He has to handle his memories, recognize the good and bad and choose to move forward. Otherwise he may end up dealing with them on the battlefield and his death while in the throes of panic is not going to make anyone feel better.”

Hera turned towards Kanan as well. “Agreed. We need to lead him to healing not to allow him to bypass it. The urge for him to sleep is doing exactly the same thing as him pushing it back into his mind; it is only putting off the inevitable. He has to learn how to deal with everything and move on. After all, these memories that he is currently dealing with is probably only the tip of the iceberg.”

Kanan nodded. “Fine. I guess I’m overruled. Get Ezra, we need to all be ready for when Alexsandr wakes back up.” Chopper came in and left to get him. Extra time away from an irate Hera is always better than dealing with his impending punishment. 

<><><><><><>

Kallus slowly woke up from his force-induced sleep to the feeling that something was wrong. His long years in the ISB led him to follow his gut instincts without fail. He could feel that something had changed in the atmosphere. At first, it was the change in temperature, a sure sign that another person was in the room. Then there was the smell, not an unpleasant one, but rather an earthy scent. He jumped upright upon realizing the scent belonged to a Lasat. “Zeb, what are you doing here?!”

Zeb frowned down at the human. Aware that his presence was unwelcomed, but not willing to give him an inch. “What do yer think I am doing here? You’re my friend. I am not about to leave you to deal with everything without me. I know Ezra and Kanan made you a promise and they didn’t break it. Chopper and I decided that we needed to know that you were safe and decided to make sure you weren’t doing anything stupid. A good thing too, since your stubborn, nerf-herding self decided that a fellow soldier could not possibly understand what you are going through. I am slightly insulted.” His ears drooped further down as a slow growl came through his throat. “How are we supposed to help each other out if you never share with me what is going on in that small, blonde head of yours?”

Kallus looked between the other members of the Ghost crew. “How did this come about?”

Hera looked at him and sighed, “Chopper and Zeb took it upon themselves to bug the room and heard everything. They are being dealt with for their spying and lack of understanding of privacy. That being said, however, it has been agreed upon that it will be up to you if they can stay or not. Zeb believes that you are close to talking about Onderon and Lassan. In his debriefing after Geonosis, he told us you discussed a lot about the two planets and the campaigns, but did not get into specific details. Citing that it was not important outside the conversation you both shared. It is up to you Alexsandr if this will do for you or not.”

Kallus nodded slightly. “He is right. I guess since they already know a lot of the back story, then it is only fair for them to stay. Even though this puts a lot of trust issues to the forefront of my mind. Trust earned is easily lost after all and takes a while to be earned again Garazeb Orrelios.” Zeb drooped his head a little bit and nodded his understanding.

“After the chancellor had me switched over to the military academy. I found a niche in the learning and stuck to it. There were times when my classes would be suspended and a new project would be applied. I found that patterns and analyses was a favorite of mine and the Empire appeared to agree. One such day, a new instructor was introduced. His name was Wullf Yularen. He was the one that found I was going to be taken into a walker unit and decided that my abilities would be better situated with the ISB. The military command disagreed and, unbeknownst to me, a new challenge to showcase my abilities was instituted.

“Everyday I would receive new information and ordered to find a pattern. Sometimes that pattern appeared easily and other times, it took a while to locate them. I would earn high marks at times and low marks at other times. I loved patterns so I not only analyzed the information given to me, but also what answers received the highest marks and the similarities between the information and the answers. Soon I noticed a pattern and started to look specifically for that pattern in all the information I received. Every time I saw an impoverished area or planet receive attention and help that appeared outside the normal abilities of the persons there, I would make a note of it. The more things appeared to happen to the good of the people and the more harm to the Empire, the higher accuracy I put to it being of interest.

“This went on for several months until I was transferred completely to the ISB Academy. It was later on, after Geonosis happened, that I looked up all my reportings and realized that every report I pushed out to the Empire would correlate with a Jedi or Padawan being tried and executed or an ambitious cell being destroyed. I pushed through the executions of over 20 Jedi during that time and the subsequent time at the ISB Academy.” Kallus frowned at the memories. His thoughts succumbed to the grief and he waited for the anger to roll off Kanan and Ezra. Who was he to judge their righteous anger towards him after what he just admitted. He should consider himself lucky if they would even talk to him again.

Kanan and Ezra shared a glance and then they looked towards Hera. “Alexsandr, we are not going to punish you for excelling at your studies as a student. You were unaware of the consequences of your assignments. Even if you knew, you were still young and reeling from the death of your brother, whom you have already said, was attributed to the overzealous nature of a young Jedi-in-training.”

Kanan nodded, “Be at peace Alexsandr. Please continue.”

Kallus looked up questioningly for a moment before starting his story again. “I neared the end of my studies and was surprised to find that Corland was there as well. He told me how he hacked into the computer and got himself transferred over to the officer’s corps of the Academy for ISB agents. He knew I would need help and managed to put himself on all of my going away missions so that we could work together. 

“I was so appreciative to him for that. It was nice knowing that I had someone who actually had my back on my team at all times. Backstabbing is quite common in the Empire and especially so for the ISB. All that comfort was quickly forgotten one day. We were told that our first true assignment was about to begin. We were to go to Onderon and rescue citizens that were being kept from escaping. I figured it should be a fairly easy job, go in - get them and get out. I never realized how wrong I could have been. The assignment was filled with holes of information and soon we were over our heads; the problem was - we had no idea. We were walking to our own execution, without realizing it.”

<><><><><><>

Onderon

Kallus marched to the tune of the academy beat as he headed towards the midships to get to the hanger bay and his shuttlecraft. The silence inside the dreary walls gave him solace as his mind worked on auto-pilot planning out that day’s activities and where his unit would need to proceed. A sharp sound of slapping boots were heard in the background, causing Kallus to grimace. Who would run on a military ship. Thank goodness it is no one I know. “Kallus wait up!” Kallus turned sharply and saw his comrade Corland running up to him in a sprinter’s pace. 

“I assume there is a reason why you are breaking protocol on our very first mission.” Kallus looked at Corland in such a way that any other person would have cowered and excused himself on his knees backwards. Corland rolled his eyes. “Come on, we both know you are not a stick in the mud like some of these snobs.” Kallus rolled his eyes back.

“Are the troops ready to proceed down to the planet?”

“Yes lieutenant. They are all ready and accounted for sir. The shuttle is ready for takeoff upon our arrival sir. You will be excited to know that they are all waiting on bended knee for your presence sir.” 

Kallus rolled his eyes and punched Corland in the shoulder. “Come on smartass.”

The shuttle was ready in the hanger bay and was loaded with the rest of his ISB unit and a squadron of troopers. “Ten-hut” was heard as the two approached the downed ramp. The large shuttle was cramped with personnel, rifles and other items that may prove to be necessary during their rescue mission. Kallus saluted his troops and marched to the front of the personnel bay. “We all know why we are heading down to the planet. There are rebels in the area causing our citizens to feel like they are in danger. Do not approach or engage the rebels. Our mission is strictly to get the citizens, get back on this shuttle and return to the destroyer. No one is to perform any heroics unless absolutely necessary. Killing yourselves for no reason will be punished by a posthumous court martial and may necessitate me giving CPR to persons that I would rather not touch my mouth to.” Chuckles could be heard from the ISB group while the troopers continued to stand at attention without saying a word. “Everyone prepared? Great. Let’s go.” Kallus turned and entered the segmented flight deck and left the troopers and ISB units to continue their discussions and intense dislikement for each other on their own.

The drop zone was towards one of the major cities on the planet and the ship made good time. Soon a green light came on inside the holding area to signify the doors were about to open and the personnel would be jumping out to start their mission. Kallus came into the bay and headed towards the front. “We get in, get our people and get out. No excursions!” Kallus nodded as each person nodded their head in agreement, the noise of the landing too loud to hear words.

The door opened and hot air took everyone’s breath away, except for the storm troopers, whose helmets kept their temperature at an even degree. The group moved forward as a unit through the dry, arid streets looking at alleys and what appeared to be abandoned abodes. A couple of storm troopers would venture at times to check out potential problems and then would meet up later down the street as the ISB attachment continued enroute to the identified residences. Kallus looked towards Corland who shrugged his shoulders, wary of the silence that made the hairs on the back of their necks stand up. 

A trooper stepped towards an abandoned cart when Kallus suddenly realized this seemed more like a trap or ambush than a rescue mission. “Wait, stop!” The trooper looked back just as a device popped out of the cart and shot to the feet of the trooper. Several other devices seemed to have been thrown from the top of the buildings into the middle of the detachment. All had the sounds of a quick timer and ended with a loud and forceful explosion. The troopers and ISB personnel at the middle of the group were instantly killed by either the explosion itself or the blast wave coming off the devices. The rest were incapacitated and fell to the ground. 

Kallus felt like he was looking outside of his body at the floating debris of sand and shrapnel that seemed to hang in the air as if they were weightless. His brain, in a desperate attempt to protect itself, slowed down his processing speed and was making quick work of checking for injuries. He slowly looked around to see personnel with injuries ranging from needing bacta patches to bacta tanks. Some would never need any medical help on this plane of existence again. 

A sound like an animal growling registered in his mind as he looked towards the smoke coming through the alleys and buildings where the explosions shot debris. A large being started walking through the detachment, kicking over personnel to see if they were alive. Kallus thought back to his ISB training on the planet. Onderonian rebellion includes a large, furry beast….a Lasat. Honorable creatures that only fight when provoked and follow specific rules and guidelines. Kallus watched the creature carefully, as well as the rest of the group. Several other members of the being’s group were already pillaging Imperials of their things. Good luck charms were snatched, appraised and either taken or thrown aside. The troopers that survived were shot in the head and the group moved on, but the large beast seemed to focus only on the ISB agents. Kallus watched as the supposedly honorable Lasat would go up to the members and sniff them before torturing them slowly while grinning.. Kallus did not understand why he would do this, but saw the creature use a long knife to cut throats and bodies as he moved through the group. Corland, where is he? 

Kallus turned his head frantically to find his best friend and located him just off his right with blood coming out of his ears. Okay, some brain swelling - a bacta tank for you. Corland then groaned loudly as he tried to regain consciousness and the furry beast’s ears twitched at the noise. No! Kallus’ eyes widened as the realization that his best friend could die on this planet. He groaned louder, hoping to take the attention off Corland. The creature sniffed over towards them both, smiled and then continued to execute the other members of the detachment. Sometimes, he would look at the pair as he crushed skulls, tore apart bodies and mangled honorable members of the Empire, personnel that did nothing to provoke the kind of disgusting behavior on display.

Work, why won’t you work?! Legs and arms are supposed to move when the brain sends signals. Why won’t you work?! Kallus looked up as the large creature moved towards the rest of his group and had a quick discussion, looking towards him and Corland every now and then. The brief conversation came to an end and everyone except the heinous creature left the scene, patting each other on the back and showing off their trophies, animals. The creature then took one sniff and started coming towards Kallus and Corland.

“Hello Imperial Agent Kallus. We were told to expect you here at this time. I wonder if you are even aware of the moles in your midst? Will this thought haunt you as much as I hope it will.” The heinous creature had a smile showing bloody teeth and fangs. “I just want you to get the full picture of what your Empire has created here today.” Kallus watched as he slowly walked across the bloody, dusty ground towards Corland. A low groan escaped Corland’s mouth as his eyes tried to open. “I want you to always remember this day.”

“Why?! You are just going to kill me anyways! Why are you so bent on prolonging this more than it needs to be done?” Kallus shouted at the creature, desperate for his body to respond to his commands and allow him to hopefully save his friend or die trying.

“Oh, Agent Kallus. I am not going to kill you. I have plans for you. You will be the mouthpiece for our grand rebellion. Through your information, everyone will fear the Partisans and will finally recognize our strength. No one will want to mess with us ever again.” The creature took one last sniff towards Kallus and then walked over to Corland. “I can smell your fear, more now than before. He means something to you, doesn’t he? This Imperial? I can make his death a slow one or a fast one, all you have to do is ask.”

Kallus tried to reach out to his friend, tried to get up, why isn’t anything working?! The creature started pulling on the limbs of Corland, testing their strength. “Please, make it fast. Please. I will beg, anything. If you are not going to let him live, then please do it quickly.” Kallus begged, tears running down his cheeks.

The creature looked at him and with a feral smile that almost looked comical on his muscular frame, tore apart his friend. Corland never made a sound, still stuck in his concussion. Kallus’ tears came in earnest. He refused to close his eyes and be a coward during his best friend’s final moments. The creature then came up to him, bloody from upright ear to clawed toe, “Agent Kallus, remember this day what happens to those who go against the Partisans.” Kallus screamed as the creature inserted his sharp claws into both cheeks and dragged down prior to releasing him.

<><><><><><>

Present Day

Kallus’ breathing was jagged at the memory as everyone looked on, some in horror and others like Zeb in fury. “I passed out after that happened. I don’t even know what happened to the bodies. Only that we were evacuated from Onderon and the Empire bombed several villages in revenge and to make the locals know what they were signing on for by siding with the Partisans. I woke up later on in a hospital with large scars on my cheeks and my memories.” Kallus breathed in as if on cue by someone else and breathed out. His mind still not quite in the present, but no longer stuck in the past. “I was given an award by Emperor Palpatine and had a visit by Lord Vader, but I don’t really remember it that well. All I know is that once I was released, I was reassigned to locate moles in the ranks and all rebellions, under orders to destroy them all.” He breathed a sharp intake of breath. Looking around at everyone’s faces. “I did my job, I craved it - even to the point of being angry when I failed. My record shows that I was almost on a crusade to get them all. I know part of it would be from my anger centered around Corland, but it didn’t make sense. I was like a wolf on the hunt - anything that got in the way was taken care of or destroyed.”

“Hmm. It is possible given Palpatine’s interest in you, that Vader was sent there to cement certain memories in your mind to come forward whenever you heard of rebels in an area or a mole in the Empirical ranks.” Kanan said as he stroked his beard with his hand. “It would explain how you were able to do all of these hunts with little sleep and still maintain a sharp eye. A memory probe left in your mind that brought all this to the front would have made it almost impossible to walk away from a mission.”

Zeb stood abruptly. His fangs gleaming in the ship’s evening lights. “I believe storytime is over for today. Come on Kallus. I think it is time for you to try to relax and get some sleep. Tomorrow is another day and we can continue then. I doubt you are up to talking about Lassan right now.” Kallus looked up suddenly to Zeb. His head nodded as his body refused to move, still stuck in the unnatural paralysis just as he experienced in the battle field. 

Kanan looked over and placed a hand on Kallus shoulder. “Your body is your own, Alexsandr. You control it, no one else does. I know this is going to be hard, but we will get through this together. We all will.” Kallus looked up with exhausted eyes. He gave a brief nod and followed Zeb back to the cabins. 

Hera’s lekku were still stiff and yet twitching at the same time. Her jaw was ground tight and her eyes looked like they were ready to turn her body towards a threat to destroy it. She was strung tight and ready to explode in a moment’s notice. “Ezra, go to bed in my top bunk. I am pretty sure Zeb has put Alexsandr in your’s. He is going to want to watch him to make sure he is okay. I think he also feels slightly responsible for everything the Lasat did, even though he should know it is not his fault.”

Ezra looked to Hera and then nodded, leaving the two grownups alone in the room. Kanan waited until he heard the last cabin door shut and then gently touched Hera’s shoulder. She jumped up from her seat, her lekku sharply flowing like a bat ready to hit anything in her area. “Of all the disgusting, unethical, maniacal things anyone could have done. Those idiots cost us more lives than they ever saved. They took a person and made him into a one-man weapon. I have to let the leadership know about this. This, this - this is insane!” Hera slammed her fists down on the dejarik table as she let loose her frustration. “Those animals destroyed people like they were putting down some sort of rabid creature! Worse, they took their time and made them suffer. No one deserves that, no matter what the Empire may do to our families, friends and teammates. There is supposed to be respect for your enemy! I, I - I want to kill them myself!” Hera breathed hotly as she shivered from the loss of adrenaline, her anger quickly depleting her energy reserves. Kanan got up and approached her with sound steps so she would not be startled. 

“Hera. War crimes are nothing new, unfortunately, for either side. We just have to figure out what we are going to do about it now and in the future. Alexsandr is our main focus now and I feel tomorrow is going to go even worse than today. Today, he was the victim of war crimes, tomorrow he will be telling us his story of how he became the Monster of Lassan, just like that Lasat was the Monster of Onderon. We have to be strong and for that, we need to rest.” Kanan’s head shifted to an angle as he closed his eyes briefly. “Kallus is asleep, although not soundly. Zeb is angry and wired, but watching over him. Noone is going to bother him tonight. You can send your report to the council from your room. I will keep you company tonight.” Hera turned towards him, tears running down her cheeks. She nodded briefly then exited the room. Perhaps Hera was right. Zeb will help him deal with his memories if he wakes up. I will make sure Hera is up to dealing with more of this emotional load tomorrow. Kanan looked towards Chopper who grumbled and then started shutting down and locking up the Ghost from all visitors. 

Kanan sighed and started trudging towards Hera’s cabin. Tomorrow would be another messy day, for everyone.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope to add on to this story as I make more edits to further chapters.


End file.
